Thursday, September 30, 2010

Roller Coaster {of love}

This is what our life has been like the past few weeks.

One minutes he's up and happy and fine and pleasant. The next minute he's angry, obstinate and rude.

We go back to the useless psychiatrist one more time next week and then we will meet with a CABF-affiliated psychiatrist. It is my hope that the new doc can shed some light on C's situation and guide us a bit better on how to handle his ups and downs and all arounds.

This morning (or last night) was not fun with him. I was called every name in the book and was showed complete disrespect from him. I've had a hard time dealing with it today and frankly, am not looking forward to picking him up at school today.

I want some peace. Lately I've been having a hard time remembering that it's not necessarily "him" that's been so abusive to us, but a hurting, not well, child instead.

Any of you have any advice on how you look at the big picture when your child seems to be taking every little thing out on you?



  1. I am so sorry, Sarah! I know it is hard when they have such a love/hate relationship with us. One thing that helps me a little bit is to try remember that the reason they take all of their frustration out on us is because we are the one thing in their life that they can count on to never leave them or stop loving them. The instinctively believe that because we are their mothers we should be able to fix things and when we can't that is so frustrating to them (and us!). Hang in there! It will get better. Praying for you!

  2. I sure can relate to the feeling angry at the kid we want to love. I just try to be in the moment, I try not to beat myself up when I'm mad at him, I try to keep my distance so I don't do or say something I may regret. With a little time and separation, I remember once again that it is his illness I'm mad at. What has helped me a lot lately is getting that alone time (away from child), either by yourself or with friends. That has really lifted me up during these dark times.